I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I think I sprained my soul last night
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Randomize
