i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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