you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
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