careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
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