Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
