chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
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