when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
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