In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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