But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
