Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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