She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
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