I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
