Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
