So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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