all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
