It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
Boobs speak an international language.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
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