Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
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