It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
operation have a gay friend backfired
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
