found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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