I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Sorry about my life...
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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