All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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