we made out on top of his cat.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
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I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
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He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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