Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
