So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
