WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
