I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
