I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
