Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
