dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
