After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
