I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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