i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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