I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
