Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
