Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
