he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize