oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize