guys are not supposed to queef...right?
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Verdict: uncircumcised.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
