we have pet lesbian snakes
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
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