i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
I'm bleeding and have questions
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
