I love black thongs
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
