you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
