He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
He didn't get how "starting a flash flood in my thunderhole" was a sexy euphemism. Deal breaker.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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