I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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