You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
She's like a pop up book from hell.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
