I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
someone get that fucking seahorse.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
