This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
