Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
