Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize