good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
