lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize
